Council To Start Using Olde English At Meetings

Municipal spokesperson Cajory Richeumo has announced that starting in July 2015, mayor & council will begin speaking in Olde English at their meetings. This coincides with the prayer recited at the start of every municipal meeting where the Borough Clerk recites a King James version of a prayer filled with Thy and Thine.

Cajory Richeumo was quoted as saying “Borough Hall used to be church. Betcha didn’t know that! So we’re going back to the church and cleaning out the non-Parkers.”

Trials for sorcery will also be added to the agenda to weed out heretics. Council will be exempt though since some of them don’t even pray during thine prayers.

Next up. Wigs!